A Story with a Morel

This is a rare "Tree Fable" that has no trees per se. Neither was it inspired by a photograph from my brother Everett. Rather, a friend of mine, Diane, posted the joke contained in the first paragraph. I took it from there. I'll add some illustrations later.

A mushroom walked into a tavern. The keeper yelled, "We don't serve mushrooms! Get out!" "What's the matter?" the mushroom replied, feeling hurt. "I'm a fungi."

But the keeper insisted, so he left.

He went to an all night restaurant where he sat at the counter on a toed stool. A female fungus walked in. She'd been kicked out of the same tavern. He took a lichen to her and asked her to join him.

As they left he gave some money to a young street urchin. She was impressed with his generosity, but he explained that once he was spore and knew how it felt.

As they were both morel individuals, I moss tell you they grew close very quickly, practically overnight. They went sailing together, to Port Obello.

They did kind things for one another, and seemed to be no truffle at all.  Eventually, he gave her a beautiful fairy ring and asked her to marry him. She said yes.

One day, as they were walking, they passed by the same tavern they'd been kicked out of. They decided to invite the keeper to their wedding, as he'd been instrumental in getting the two of them together.

As they walked in the door, the keeper shouted, "For peat's sake, didn't I tell you two we don't serve mushrooms! GET OUT!"

So they eloped.